When I was doing my bachelors degree
Nothing annoyed me more
Than the temerity
Of those mature age students
You know the earnest kind
That asked questions
Or wanted to discuss
the feminist perspective
that seemed interested in the actual course
like they may have done the actual readings
and wanted to actually discuss
the actual ideas
acting like they came here to learn
when the rest of us
just wanted
to go
to Shadows
and get
CRUUUUUUUNNNNNNK
wake up in
someone else’s bed drunk
but it’s ok
because I can’t actually remember
how I got there anyway
and there are songs that tell me that I can
blame it on the a –a –a –a alcohol
I was doing law
and you KNOW there is nothing as arrogant
as a fucking
law-student-straight-out-of-high-school
(the decile ten ones where everyone’s daddy
is a doctor
or a judge)
who think they own the world
even when
they’re barely
scraping through
those golden children
who tell themselves their parents
should be grateful
because they are fulfilling
their dreams
who sit in class
playing candy crush
or waiting to see how many people like
their statuses
on facebook
and
who can’t wait
to cross-examine
the shit
out of someone
in real life.
But in real life
I work in a male dominated industry
And get paaaaaiiiiiid (hi 5 to me)
much more than
my sisters ever will
despite their Masters degrees
in early childhood education
and I barely even have time
to reflect on that
or on life’s other little ironies
as I pass off my children off
to them
at 8am
and kiss their foreheads
and say confidently
“Mummy’s going out
to change the world”.
In real life
There are hardworking
intelligent
people
Who will never get the opportunity
To go to university
No matter how much we talk about equality
Who won’t know
that they are smart enough
Who haven’t been told
how clever they are
Because their mum’s busy mopping the
supermarket floor
and their dad is going on another night
tour
those kids don’t need
to learn humility
they see it
in the eyes of their parents
every
single
time
they get off the phone
with WINZ
so they can’t even imagine
taking on a loan
they just want to go out
and save
their family
from drowning in debt
and yet
When I was doing my bachelors degree
Nothing annoyed me more
Than the temerity
Of those mature age students
Acting like
they came here
to learn.
